Put to rest your fears of “not meditating right”
As I’ve started teaching and working with others, I will say that one of the most common comments and/or questions I get is: I don’t know if I’m meditating right (or correctly, okay, or some other variant).
In this post, I’ll talk about some requirements for meditation (there are only a few), some do’s and don’ts, and some of my personal experiences.
What you need for meditation
Physical needs
You can use a few tools for meditation. However, if you just have a quiet spot where you won’t be disturbed, and some time, then you’re good to go. You don’t need much else,ย physically.
Mental needs
A desire to do it
You have to have the desire to do it. If there’s no desire, then no amount of “making yourself do it”, is going to work.
In order to maximize the benefits you get from meditation, you need to want to do this practice –ย every day.
Soccer practice
I’ll use the example of soccer. You wouldn’t compete in a game without weeks of practice, right? Even then, you wouldn’t be as good if you’d only practiced one season, as opposed to seven seasons, or more. Professional athletes sometimes have been at their practice for decades. Every day. Or just about every day.
Toothbrushing practice
To use a more extreme example, let’s look at brushing your teeth. If you only brushed your teeth “when you felt like it” can you imagine what your teeth would look like? Still, you wouldn’t really get much benefit from brushing if you only did it once in a while. Your teeth would be stained. Terrible breath would emanate from your mouth. Your gums would bleed, or worse. You get the idea.
Meditation practice
It’s the same for meditation: you need to “practice” every day to get the benefits. Twice a day is even better. Spending 5 minutes meditating in the morning, and 5 minutes in the afternoon isย better than if you just meditated for 10 minutes in the morning.
If the morning’s all you got, however, then by all means, spend the 10 minutes meditating in the morning.
Settle in on your favorite type of meditation
Different meditations have you focus on different things.
If you like mantras, then those will be your focus. Mindfulness awareness is a focus on the breath. Perhaps your focus is a singing bowl or bell. Maybe you like focusing on candle flames.
A guided meditation is also a focus: you’re bringing your attention back to the speaker or the sounds in the meditation.
Anything that focuses your attention that uses sound, a feeling, or an object for gazing, is just fine for meditation.
You’re “meditating right”
If you have the desire, and something to focus on, then you’re on your way to a successful meditation session.
Sure, you’ll need to focus and re-focus. But just remember: it’s all part of the practice.
There is more to it, of course. More than just wanting to, and finding a focus…and that’s where a teacher can come in. Like me!
My experiences with this
When I began meditating regularly in 2008, I used a mantra. I loved it. It’s what got me into meditation.
I started out with 15 minutes. My mind was all over the place, but I would keep repeating my mantra. I’d return to it. Over and over.
With a decade of continuous practice, the thoughts still come. But there are more and more moments where I “touch the silence.” There are more blips of time where I don’t have thoughts coming.
Or the thoughts will come, but as I refocus, new thoughts are slower to come.
Thought-free meditation?
For me? Never.
Sometimes I have fewer thoughts. Other times it’s cascading marbles into a pool. Each time, I come back to my mantra.
I come back, day after day, knowing that the benefits of my practice are stacking up.
I love the idea of practice as I completely agree that whatever you set out to do and accomplish practice is key. I mean take, for instance, learning math (yes the math teacher in me still prevails) it takes time, patience and practice to learn certain mathematics concepts. Therefore, you are so rgith practice really is central in meditation or just about anything you could want to achieve in this world. Hugs and thank you for sharing always your own experiences here. Happy Monday now xoxo <3
Sweet Janine. Happy Monday. Thank you for coming over. I remembered how you were trained in math. Me? In Spanish. And yes, I totally relate and understand. It takes time to build skills and learn concepts – with anything in life. ๐ Sending you big hugs and thank you, always, for your insights. xo
I don’t thing Cynthia I have ever yet meditated without the intrusion of some thoughts or another creeping up on you.. We will never empty the mind.. But as you say, if we bring our attention back to breath or a mantra, we start again and you will eventually drift to that sacred place.. And when you find that place, I garentee you will want to return again and again to that blissful peaceful place..
Loved reading this Cynthia.. Wishing you a beautiful week.. Love and Hugs my friend <3
Sue – so spot on! Meditation with lots and lots of thoughts. Every single day. Every single time. Hehe. And sometimes I forget that I’m following the tangent of thoughts and go on a little thought adventure…until I remember to come back to my focus. ๐ But when those moments of silence come, it’s incredible. It’s such a euphoria – at least for me. So sacred. So incredible. It’s part of what motivates me. And you’re right: the return to that place makes me want to do everything I can to return. My whole life is changing as a result of it. ๐ Oh, friend, I’m sure you know what I mean. I feel that you, too, have been here before, experiencing this very thing – and watching as your life changed…
I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR YOU AND OUR FRIENDSHIP!! xoxo
Dear Cynthia,
I love your open and nonjudgmental approach as you share your knowledge about meditation.
I can imagine getting needlessly preoccupied with “right or wrong” and missing the benefits of “being”.
Love you and big hugs, Maria
Sweet Mar – thank you for your sweet thoughts and insights. Yes…open and non-jugdmental – so key to remember. Every meditation is a GOOD meditation. ๐ It can be easy to think, “is this worth it? is it right? am I doing this right?” when in reality, doing the meditation and focusing are enough. ๐ Sending you big hugs and wishes for a wonderful weekend! ๐โฎ๏ธ